#oldpeopleproblems

I’m getting old. Which used to be a hard pill to swallow. But now I just swallow my many vitamins, anti aging tonics, and accept it. Aside from the obvious physical changes; slower metabolism, grey hairs popping up, and having to brush my teeth all the time to ward off old people breath, there are a few other things that indicate my journey into geriatrics.

 

I’m a public radio station member. I have no problem supporting KCRW because it’s the shit! But if 21 year old Kiana were asked to join a public supported radio station she might say; “Talk radio is for old people”.

I enjoy various soups. Classic old people meal. And the other day I even made tomato soup from scratch! That exclamation point was genuine excitement by the way.

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I care about what goes on in the world. Not that I didn’t care about what went on the world before I became 30. I just realized that one day my generation will be running things so I pray they get their shit together.

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I try to dress age appropriate. I have to stop myself from buying novelty tees with trendy sayings on them like; “I woke up like this” or “Twerk Team Captain”.

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Friends with benefits are out of the question. What do I look like? A 21 year old? A basketball ‘wife’? Video vixen? A chick with low self esteem? I think you get the point.

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I pay bills when I receive them (sometimes)There’s nothing like the feeling of having your bills paid weeks before they’re due.– Some old person.

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I love shopping for home goods. I should probably get a tattoo of Trader Joes & Target so they know it’s real. Evevn though I don’t have a family to shop for I’ve come to the conclusion that is impossible to spend less than $50 on any Traget trip. And I have to go to Trader Joes at least twice a week to re up on produce and my favorite snacks.
I enjoy early bedtimes and naps. Who ever said they can sleep when they die must have had a sad tired life. With my schedule and aspirations I need all the rest I can get.
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I play the lotto occasionally. Not because I think I will win but because that’s just what old people do.

I don’t know who new celebrities are. I have to stay current on my pop culture so it saddens me when I don’t know the difference between an Ariana Grande or a Vanessa Hudgens. That’s the same thing right?

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