As a kid I used to think the archetypal single 30-year-old woman getting set up by her friends and family was just something comedy writers wrote into shows for laughs; until I became single and 30. That actually sounds like an R.L Stine older adult horror novel. And if this were the olden days I would be labeled a spinster destined to die alone. But what does it mean in 2015? Umm, that I’m normal. It still doesn’t save me from all the well intentioned (unwanted) hook up offers from friends.
The other day it got so bad a friend tried to hook me up with a guy SHE met on Tinder, that she thought would be perfect for me. He was a stand up comedian that seemed to have my same witty charm but I’m sure I’ll probably end up being the punchline of one his jokes. That’s when I said WWMD (What would Miranda do). That’s right I’m a Miranda with a sketchy Carrie past. Miranda would probably say, “I appreciate your efforts but no thank you.” Maybe I’ll meet my Steve one day. Hopefully he won’t be a bartender though, no offense to bartenders.
Speaking of meeting guys, where do you meet them? That wasn’t a rhetorical question, I actually have no idea where or how to meet decent guys. Then I realized they are all online dating. So I’ve tried (and by tried I mean I’ve made a profile, browsed the options and deleted the app after I was quickly let down by my “matches/suitors”.) But there’s a distinct difference in the quality of men depending on which dating app you’re using.
My classification is: Plenty Of Fish-hook ups and weirdos, OKCupid (More like “OkStupid”) hook ups and weirdos, Tinder hook ups with weirdos. Then there is eHarmony, my fail safe.
I always said when I was really ready for a relationship I would just make an eHarmony account. I’ve seen their commercials; I even interviewed at the company and saw their wall of fame of successful relationships. So I know it would be inevitable for me to find love. So I created a profile. However, some marketing genius over there came up with the idea of letting you create a profile, post a picture, and even receive messages but not allow you to view those messages or matches until you pay the fee. I almost did until I realized the cost of a subscription was a PS3. Was I ready to make such an expensive commitment? The price alone let me know that every man on this site was serious about finding love. But was I so sure? I decided I still had hope of meeting “the one” in real life and that I would rather the use the money buy an actual PS3. They have awesome games!