I went to a screening of End of the Tour last week. I had seen the trailer and thought I might want to see it
, but not pay for it. Then KCRW surprised its members (me) with free tickets (free shit!), so I had to go. The movie is about a Rolling Stone interview (that was never published) between David Foster Wallace, a fiction writer, and Dave Lipsky a writer and journalist for the magazine. I wasn’t familiar with the story and only knew that David F. Wallace had committed suicide a few years back.
So why am I writing a post about it this? Well for one I’m still trying to decide if the movie was good or just really, really, pretentious? I’m not familiar with novelist personalities so I don’t know if they are all portrayed like the guys in the film; super smart and tortured. I did however see a few similarities between both guys and myself. David said things that I related to so much that it was scary considering he was a guy who killed himself. Things like he doesn’t like getting close to people because he’s scared he’s going to hurt them. I have that same feeling when it comes to men. I’ve never said this out loud because I always thought it was a pretty arrogant thing to say. David, who was also a fellow introvert, went on to say he feels like he uses people for company.
I can think of specific times when I’ve been tired of my solitude and reached out to find someone to hang out with. But what’s wrong with that? I can’t be around people 24/7. And I can’t be alone 24/7 either. So why not reach out to people when you’re lonely? Maybe it’s the motive? Loneliness, that was what his novel, Infinite Jest, was about. Or at least that’s what he intended it to be about. Sometimes I wonder if the only way to be a good writer, a successful one, is to be slightly to severely mentally disturbed. I do know you have to have a great deal of self-awareness. So, I guess I’m recommending this movie.