So I go to the gym sometimes. 24 Hour Fitness because I’m basic AF. I’ve been going to same 24 Hour Fitness for the past 2 or 3 years. I usually go around the same time through the week, between 5-6am. So naturally, I see the same front desk guy every time I go. Pause. Let’s back up to what I look like going to the gym between 5-6am; my hair is pulled back into a low ponytail
that screams butch lesbian or mother of 4, I’m wearing a oversized KCRW hoodie, workout pants, and my eyebrows haven’t been filled in.
So basically, I look like a wildebeest and I try not to make eye contact with humans. But that front desk guy, the black guy with dreads that would be cute if he didn’t work at 24 Hour Fitness, ALWAYS speaks to me. I know it’s his job to greet me as I’m checking in but is it also his job to start making small talk?
Front Desk Guy: “Hey I’ve seen you in here twice this week, good for you, enjoy your workout”, “You look tired this morning, that workout ought to help, enjoy your workout”, “Hey you’re here at a different time, you’re switching it up on me, enjoy your workout”.
I’m sorry I don’t want my gym to be the place where everybody knows my name. I want to sweat in solitude and go home. The real issue here is that I just don’t like people getting familiar with me. This isn’t the 1950s where you walk down the street and every shop owner knows you. I don’t need the Trader Joes employee knowing my favorite snack (sweet potato tortilla chips). While there are some people who love being recognized at the establishments they frequent because it makes them feel important, I do not. Being a regular is just another sign that you’re getting old because you have a routine. For example, have you ever noticed when an old person tells you about a place they go to, they’ve been going there for ‘years’? Nope, not me. I’ll just keep juggling 4 Trader Joes just so no one gets familiar and directs me to the sweet potato tortilla chip aisle when I walk in.